Sex Gets Real: Talking Sex, Relationships, and Kink with Dawn Serra (health, sexuality)

Guess what?

I'm now hosting group calls every other week where we practice skills, dive deep into improving our relationships, learn how to talk about sex, and so much more. Join in the fun and let's level up together. Learn more and enroll here.

Plus, Patreons who support at the $20 level and above get FREE access to the group calls. You can support the show at any level from $1 and up and it means so much to me. Literally, every pledge sends me into an excited squeal of delight. patreon.com/sexgetsreal

On to this week's show with Ruby Bouie Johnson, the Black Sex Geek herself. 

This is an episode entirely about polyamory. It's raw and funny, and so so real. This is a no-holds-barred chat about the good, the super bad, and the beautiful parts of poly communities.

Ruby talks about how polyamory healed her in deeply personal and liberating ways, but only after expressing some mindblowing thoughts about the sexism, ageism, racism, and oppressive BS that's so common in poly communities around the country.

Plus, she shares her thoughts on the folks who are constantly on the hunt for that perfect unicorn and why it's so exhausting as a poly educator to have to field these (typically offensive) requests.

It's juicy. It's ugly. It's hysterical. And it will give anyone in or considering a polyamorous dynamic a lot to think about.

My biggest take away? That inclusion is NOT a policy or a mission statement. It is a deliverable and it is VISIBLE. You can say you're inclusive all you want but unless you see that reflected in the people who actually participate and attend - unless you see POC and fat bodies and a variety of abilities and disabilities, it's all lip service.

Follow Sex Gets Real on Twitter and Facebook. It's true. Oh! And Dawn is on Instagram.

Resources discussed in this episode

The New York Times piece on non-monogamy that Ruby wrote about is here.

Ruby's response to the NYT piece, 'What the New York Times Neglected to See.'

About Ruby Bouie Johnson

Ruby Bouie Johnson is a clinical social worker and sex therapist located in Plano, Texas. Ruby’s primary client base are folks who are kinky, in consensual nonmonogamous relationships, queer, lesbian, bisexual, and gay, and sexual challenges. She works with individuals, couples, triads, quads, and polycules with power dynamics within their relationships. Ruby has published in various journals and in the African American Encyclopedia on Criminology. Ruby has presented at Kinky Kollege, Consent Summit, Association of Black Sexologist and Clinicians, and will present at the upcoming American Association of Sexologists, Educators, Counselors, and Therapists Conference. Ruby Johnson is a contributor for HuffPo and Black and Poly Magazine. Ruby Johnson is on faculty for the Kink Knowledgeable Program. Mrs. Johnson serves on the board for the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom.

You can stay in touch with Ruby at blacksexgeek.net and on Facebook and Twitter @blacksexgeek.

Ruby is also the CEO, Founder, and organizer for PolyDallas Millennium LLC. The 3rd Annual Symposium is July 14-16 in Dallas Texas. You can learn more and register at www.polydallasmillennium.com and also check out the conference's Facebook and Twitter @polydallas2015

Listen and subscribe to Sex Gets Real

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Hearing from you is the best

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Contact form: Click here (and it's anonymous)

Direct download: Episode_166.mp3
Category:Health, Sexuality -- posted at: 5:30am EST

Interested in supporting the show? Well, now you can! Just head to Patreon.com/sexgetsreal and you can pledge anything from $1 and up. I would ADORE the support.

This week it's just you and me, working our way through some rad listener questions.

Dave wrote in with one of the best complimentary emails I've ever received AND threw a few bucks my way on Patreon.

Lala just found out she has HPV. She's brand new to dating after divorce and spending many years focusing on her kids, and she wants to know - is her sex life over? Can she find romance and love and great sex if she has HPV? I have so many thoughts, including checking out Ella Dawson and Ashley Manta as rockin' folks to follow who have amazing sex lives while navigating the world with an STI.

Lovely J listens to the show with her honey. They can't remember the name of an author I recommended a while back (it was most likely Barbara Carrellas). Also, Lovely J is an inexperienced Dominant and her partner really wants her to dominate them. She's read some books, but how can she get some hands-on practice at being a dominant? My number 1 recommendation is Midori's Forte Femme weekend intensive.

It IS possible to be a very effective, very sexy Dominant without it looking like the standard trope of a Domme you see on TV or at kink events.

Jude is a white, middle-class woman who is new to learning about sex work. How can she learn more about why people choose sex work and what it's all about?

It's critical to turn to sex workers themselves for their stories, for the lived nuance. All my book recommendations to Jude are below in the resources area.

Frank wrote in needing help finding a way to get his wife to give him a blowjob. The advice will be disappointing, but it's the best I can offer when it comes to wanting something sexually from another human being. You have to be willing to talk about it - openly and without expectation or pressure.

Kacey wants to know how common it is for women to have hair on their faces, cleavage and chest. Hirsutism can be caused by loads of things, and it's relatively common. Plus, there are so many women who are unabashedly embracing their rad beards and body hair and still having amazing sex lives and finding love. The Go Ask Alice article I mention in the episode is linked down below.

Finally, K is having an issue with a butt plug. They can have anal sex just fine, but when you use an anal plug, it hurts on the out motion. What can they do? I have some thoughts. Yay butt stuff.

Follow Sex Gets Real on Twitter and Facebook. It's true. Oh! And Dawn is on Instagram.

Resources discussed in this episode

"Ecstasy is Necessary" by Barbara Carrellas

"Urban Tantra" by Barbara Carrellas

"Coming Out Like a Porn Star" by Jiz Lee

"$pread: The Best of the Magazine that Illuminated the Sex Industry and Started a Media Revolution" by Feminist Press

"Truth, Justice, and the American Whore" by Siouxsie Q

TheWhoresOfYore.com by Kate Lister

Go Ask Alice's response to a woman with a hair issue

 

Listen and subscribe to Sex Gets Real

  1. Listen and subscribe on iTunes
  2. Check us out on Stitcher
  3. Don't forget about I Heart Radio's Spreaker
  4. Pop over to Google Play
  5. Use the player at the top of this page.
  6. Now available on Spotify. Search for "sex gets real".
  7. Find the Sex Gets Real channel on IHeartRadio.

Hearing from you is the best

Call or text: 747-444-1840 (standard messaging rates apply)

Contact form: Click here (and it's anonymous)

Direct download: Episode_165.mp3
Category:Health, Sexuality -- posted at: 5:00am EST

Sex Gets Real listeners get $30 off their first month of therapy with Talkspace

This week's episode is brought to you by Talkspace. Listeners get $30 off their first month of therapy with coupon code SGR, so check it out and spread the word to support the show.

It's not too late, either, to support the show on Patreon to hear the super juicy extended chat with Dylan from last week. Head to patreon.com/sexgetsreal and support at any level (even $1!) to hear alllllll the goodness.

Bridget Phetasy, Playboy's advice columnist on sex and relationships, is here to talk about her controversial article about orgasmic meditation.

We talk about cults, praying on people's sexual shame, boundaries, consent, and the importance of trusting those little feelings that tell you something isn't right even if you desperately want to ignore them.

Read Bridget's article over on Playboy to get the full scoop.

Follow Sex Gets Real on Twitter and Facebook. It's true. Oh! And Dawn is on Instagram.

Resources discussed in this episode

Bridget mentions the clit cult article, which is this piece by Refinery29.

About Bridget Phetasy

When she’s not penning Playboy.com’s Sex & Dating Column or the Playboy Advisor, you can usually find Bridget interviewing people on her podcast Benched. Once she was dared to do stand-up comedy. It is now her primary reason for getting out of bed. In her free time Bridget wrangles two insane puppies and is working on her humorous self-help book, Seducing Men Is Like Hunting Cows.

You can follow Bridget on Twitter @bridgetphetasy and on Facebook, too. Her new podcast, Benched, is on Twitter, too, @benchedpodcast.

Listen and subscribe to Sex Gets Real

  1. Listen and subscribe on iTunes
  2. Check us out on Stitcher
  3. Don't forget about I Heart Radio's Spreaker
  4. Pop over to Google Play
  5. Use the player at the top of this page.
  6. Now available on Spotify. Search for "sex gets real".
  7. Find the Sex Gets Real channel on IHeartRadio.

Hearing from you is the best

Call or text: 747-444-1840 (standard messaging rates apply)

Contact form: Click here (and it's anonymous)

Direct download: Episode_164.mp3
Category:Health, Sexuality -- posted at: 11:04am EST

Sex Gets Real listeners get $30 off their first month of therapy with Talkspace

This week's episode is brought to you by Talkspace. Listeners get $30 off their first month of therapy with coupon code SGR, so check it out and spread the word to support the show.

It's HERE! My recent chat with Dylan. Patreon supporters get a bonus extended version of the episode, to pop over to patreon.com/sexgetsreal and support at any level (even $1!) to hear alllllll the goodness.

So what has Dylan been up to? What's changed in her life? BIG THINGS, but only Patreon supporters will hear the juiciest of juicy details.

Dawn talks about moving to Vancouver and watching the latest Four Chambers porn by Vex Ashley while having house guests.

Then we field listener questions on nun and priest fetishes, how to eat pussy like a champ (again), and we rage over stealthing - because it's just not OK ever. You can hear round one of Dylan's oral sex tips way back on episode 5, but this is the new updated version after Dylan's latest adventures in pussy eating. Also, yay for the smell of pussy.

Follow Sex Gets Real on Twitter and Facebook. It's true. Oh! And Dawn is on Instagram.

About Dawn Serra

Sex is a social skill. I speak it. I write it. I teach it. I help you learn how to develop it.

I am the creator and host of the laughter-filled, no-holds-barred weekly podcast, Sex Gets Real. I lecture at colleges and universities on sex and relationships, too.

When I'm not speaking and teaching, I also work one-on-one with clients who need to get unstuck around their pleasure and desire.

But it's not all work! In my downtime, I can often be found watching an episode of Masterchef Australia, cooking up something delicious, or adventuring with my sexy AF husband.

Listen and subscribe to Sex Gets Real

  1. Listen and subscribe on iTunes
  2. Check us out on Stitcher
  3. Don't forget about I Heart Radio's Spreaker
  4. Pop over to Google Play
  5. Use the player at the top of this page.
  6. Now available on Spotify. Search for "sex gets real".
  7. Find the Sex Gets Real channel on IHeartRadio.

Hearing from you is the best

Call or text: 747-444-1840 (standard messaging rates apply)

Contact form: Click here (and it's anonymous)

Direct download: Episode_163.mp3
Category:Health, Sexuality -- posted at: 6:00am EST

This week's episode is brought to you by Talkspace. Listeners get $30 off their first month of therapy with coupon code SGR, so check it out and spread the word to support the show.

This week's episode is very special to me. I want to thank all of the brave souls who responded to my call for abortion stories. To read their powerful words, visit sexgetsreal.com/ep162. In fact, start there before you dive into this chat with Carol Sanger about her new book, "About Abortion: Terminating Pregnancy in 21st Century America".

Abortion can be a ridiculously charged topic in the United States, which is unique among countries with legal abortion. Carol's book is a fascinating and dare I say fun look into the legislation, the imagery, how technology has impacted the conversation, and more than anything focuses on what happens when people in marginalized positions are forced to choose secrecy over privacy.

We tie abortion to sex work, kink, polyamory, HIV/AIDS, and of course, to the larger oppressive systems at play in our society like patriarchy and gender role bullshit.

Despite the heaviness of abortion, this talk with Carol is delightful - there's intimate moments and several genuine laughs as we dive into all of the terrific research Carol has done and why it's more important than ever that we share our stories.

If abortion is a hot topic for you, I invite you to listen and to be patient. The stories, more than anything, are critical for us all to hear and absorb.

Don't forget, Patreon supporters get exclusive access to rad content and extended episodes (including my recent chat with Dylan that goes up at the end of May!) Pop over to patreon.com/sexgetsreal and support at any level (even $1!) to join in the fun.

Follow Sex Gets Real on Twitter and Facebook. It's true. Oh! And Dawn is on Instagram.

Resources mentioned in this episode

Carol mentioned a paper called, "I Would Like to Give My Baby, Like, Everything In the World," which talks about women aborting to protect their children. While this is an academic paper that is not publicly accessible, Slate wrote about the paper here.

Lindy West and Amelia Bonow started #ShoutYourAbortion and ShoutYourAbortion.com to share abortion stories.

The Rewire book review by Katie Klabusich that Carol mentions in the episode. Check it out here.

About Carol Sanger

Carol Sanger is the Barbara Aronstein Black Professor of Law at Columbia Law School. She teaches courses on contracts, family law, and others focusing on reproduction, the legal profession, and law and gender. Her recent book About Abortion (Harvard University Press) is centered on the regulation of abortion.

You can follow Carol on Twitter @carolsangernyc

Listen and subscribe to Sex Gets Real

  1. Listen and subscribe on iTunes
  2. Check us out on Stitcher
  3. Don't forget about I Heart Radio's Spreaker
  4. Pop over to Google Play
  5. Use the player at the top of this page.
  6. Now available on Spotify. Search for "sex gets real".
  7. Find the Sex Gets Real channel on IHeartRadio.

Hearing from you is the best

Call or text: 747-444-1840 (standard messaging rates apply)

Contact form: Click here (and it's anonymous

Direct download: Episode_162.mp3
Category:Health, Sexuality -- posted at: 5:00am EST

Love the show? Support it on Patreon.

Patreon supporters get exclusive access to rad content and extended episodes (including my recent chat with Dylan that goes up at the end of May!) Pop over to patreon.com/sexgetsreal and support at any level (even $1!) to join in the fun.

I am constantly on the lookout for people who are doing amazing, inspiring, fun things in the world of sex and relationships. So, you just know I had to reach out to Feminist Press when I saw they were publishing a children's book with the title, "Tell Me About Sex, Grandma."

And what better time to celebrate kids and parenting and sex and divorce and healing than Mother's Day?

Anastasia Higginbotham is the author of a series of books called Ordinary Terrible Things aimed at helping kids to understand and find words for things like sex, divorce, death, racism, and queerness. Anastasia's books are about centering kids' wisdom and giving them space to have a full range of feelings and permission to be who they are.

But the magic of these books is also in their healing power for grown-ups. If you were raped or molested, "Tell Me About Sex, Grandma" will offer a balm to your young self about what happened. If your parents split when you were young, "Divorce is the Worst" gives you permission to sit in those big feelings you may have tried to hide years ago.

This is the kind of stuff that overturns patriarchy and helps young people realize that they actually hold a tremendous amount of wisdom and power.

Also, at the end of this week's episode is a sneak peek of next week's incredible episode on abortion. Please do stay tuned.

Follow Sex Gets Real on Twitter and Facebook. It's true. Oh! And Dawn is on Instagram.

Resources discussed in this episode

You can pre-order "Tell Me About Sex, Grandma" and purchase "Death is Stupid" and "Divorce is the Worst" from Feminist Press, and you know I love supporting feminist, independent sources, so please do buy from them over Amazon or a big box retailer.

About Anastasia Higginbotham

Anastasia Higginbotham is a writer and artist who created the children’s book series Ordinary Terrible Things, published by the Feminist Press. The series includes Divorce Is the Worst (2015), Death Is Stupid (2016), and Tell Me About Sex, Grandma (2017). It’s been embraced by children and adults for empowering and trusting kids as the authority on their own lives. Higginbotham makes the books in collage on brown grocery bag paper with clippings from magazines and catalogs, and bits of fabric and jewelry that have special meaning.

Higginbotham’s series is informed by more than 20 years as a speechwriter for New York City nonprofits that combat all kinds of injustice. For 10 years, Higginbotham taught full impact self-defense to kids and adults with Prepare Inc., coaching students ages 6 and up to breathe, talk, and fight their way through confrontation and attack scenarios. Her essays have appeared in Huffington Post, Ms., Bitch, The Sun, Women’s Media Center, and The Women’s Review of Books. She’s featured in the anthologies, Listen Up: Voices from the Next Feminist Generation, 30 Things Every Girl Should Know About Women’s History, and Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual Power and a World Without Rape. She is a 2015 Hedgebrook Fellow.

You can stay in touch with Anastasia on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter @ahigginbooks.

Listen and subscribe to Sex Gets Real

  1. Listen and subscribe on iTunes
  2. Check us out on Stitcher
  3. Don't forget about I Heart Radio's Spreaker
  4. Pop over to Google Play
  5. Use the player at the top of this page.
  6. Now available on Spotify. Search for "sex gets real".
  7. Find the Sex Gets Real channel on IHeartRadio.

Hearing from you is the best

Call or text: 747-444-1840 (standard messaging rates apply)

Contact form: Click here (and it's anonymous)

Direct download: Episode_161.mp3
Category:Health, Sexuality -- posted at: 6:00am EST

This week's episode is brought to you by Talkspace. And listeners get $30 off their first month of therapy with coupon code SGR, so check it out and spread the word to support the show.

Patreon supporters! Dylan and I recorded a special episode just for you. Pop over to patreon.com/sexgetsreal and support at any level to get access when it's released in a few weeks.

Andre Shakti is BACK! She has a new project called I Am Poly and So Can You, and we go deep into non-monogamy and polyamory this week after geeking out over Erotic Film School.

When did Andre figure out she was non-monogamous, what advice does she wishes existed when she was a teenager, and what do you do if you cheated on your wife and now she wants to cheat on you?

Well, we talk about allllll of that and more this week. Andre has stellar advice for a couple who are wanting to try a threesome for the first time, and we also get a charming email from R who is in a loving triad but who needs more sex.

Poly pressure to have sex is real and Andre explores why sometimes it's OK to step off the sex train if everything else in your life feels great.

Don't forget to send in your sex confessions about May's theme of FOOD! I created a guidelines page for you.

Follow Sex Gets Real on Twitter and Facebook. It's true. Oh! And Dawn is on Instagram.

Resources mentioned in this episode

"I Love You, But I Don't Trust You: The Complete Guide to Restoring Trust in Your Relationship" by Mira Krishenbaum - Andre recommend this for working through trust issues in a relationship.

About Andre Shakti

Andre Shakti is a journalist, educator, performer, activist, and professional slut living in the San Francisco Bay Area. She is devoted to normalizing alternative desires, de-stigmatizing sex workers and their clients, and not taking herself too seriously. Andre wrestles mediocre white men into submission and writes about sex work, queerness and non-monogamy for Cosmopolitan, Rewire, Thrillist, MEL, Vice, Autostraddle, and more. She can frequently be found marathoning Law & Order: SVU under a chaotic pile of partners and pitbulls, and yes, she knows how problematic that show is. Andre is the reigning "polyamory pundit" at her non-monogamy advice column, "I Am Poly & So Can You!", which you can visit - and submit questions to! - via IAmPoly.net. Visit her on Twitter @andreshakti, on FB as "Andre Shakti", and as a pleasure professional on the new inclusive educational platform O.School.

Listen and subscribe to Sex Gets Real

  1. Listen and subscribe on iTunes
  2. Check us out on Stitcher
  3. Don't forget about I Heart Radio's Spreaker
  4. Pop over to Google Play
  5. Use the player at the top of this page.
  6. Now available on Spotify. Search for "sex gets real".
  7. Find the Sex Gets Real channel on IHeartRadio.

Hearing from you is the best

Call or text: 747-444-1840 (standard messaging rates apply)

Direct download: Episode_160.mp3
Category:Health, Sexuality -- posted at: 11:34am EST

Love the show? Support it on Patreon.

Patreon supporters! Dylan and I are planning a special episode just for you. Pop over to patreon.com/sexgetsreal and support at any level to get access when it's released in a few weeks.

This week Jaclyn Friedman is here. Known for her incredible work around sexual assault, sexual violence, consent, and sex education, it is a really intense discussion that I can't wait for you to hear.

We talk about sexual liberation and why sex positivity must include conversations around sexual violence if it hopes to achieve it's aim.

We dive into stealthing and why removing a condom without consent is rape. Jaclyn explores the ways that stealthing is dehumanizing and why this power move is about erasing the humanity of the person you're sleeping with.

She also talks about what centering humanity in sex has meant for her - being able to relax into her truth by getting off the sexual Olympics train. Plus, why all this buzz about hook-up culture on college campuses is actually a myth and the impact that myth is having on students.

Then we go deep into victim-centering justice, needing community to step in and hold sexually violent people accountable, why transformative justice is not the answer, and she even challenges me on being too generous around people who commit acts of sexual violence.

We may not have answers, but we certainly have a lot of feelings and even bigger questions. So strap in and prepare yourself.

Don't forget to send in your sex confessions about May's theme of FOOD! I created a guidelines page for you.

Follow Sex Gets Real on Twitter and Facebook. It's true. Oh! And Dawn is on Instagram.

About Jaclyn Friedman

Jaclyn Friedman is a writer, speaker and activist, and creator of the hit books Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual Power and a World Without Rape (one of Publishers’ Weekly’s Top 100 Books of 2009, and #11 on Ms. Magazine’s Top 100 Feminist Nonfiction of All Time list) and What You Really Really Want: The Smart Girl’s Shame-Free Guide to Sex & Safety. Her podcast, Unscrewed, is paving new paths to sexual liberation, and was named one of the Best Sex Podcasts by both Marie Claire and Esquire.

Friedman’s work has popularized the “yes means yes” standard of sexual consent that is quickly becoming law on many US campuses. Her insistence that authentic sexual liberation is a necessary condition to end the systemic sexualization and violation of women led Lyn Mikel Brown (Co-founder of SPARK and Professor of Education and Women’s, Gender, and Sexuality Studies, Colby College) to call her “this generation’s version of Dr. Ruth.”

Friedman is a popular speaker on campuses and at conferences across the U.S. and beyond. She has been a guest on the Today Show, Nightline, PBS News Hour, the Melissa Harris-Perry Show, and numerous other radio and television shows, and her commentary has appeared in outlets including The New York Times, Vox, TimeThe Washington Post, Glamour and The Guardian. Friedman is a founder and the former Executive Director of Women, Action & the Media, where she led the successful #FBrape campaign to apply Facebook’s hate-speech ban to content that promotes gender-based violence. Friedman also holds an MFA in creative writing from Emerson College.

You can stay in touch with Jaclyn at jaclynfriedman.com, as well as on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter @jaclynf.

Listen and subscribe to Sex Gets Real

  1. Listen and subscribe on iTunes
  2. Check us out on Stitcher
  3. Don't forget about I Heart Radio's Spreaker
  4. Pop over to Google Play
  5. Use the player at the top of this page.
  6. Now available on Spotify. Search for "sex gets real".
  7. Find the Sex Gets Real channel on IHeartRadio.

Hearing from you is the best

Call or text: 747-444-1840 (standard messaging rates apply)

Contact form: Click here (and it's anonymous)

Direct download: Episode_159.mp3
Category:Health, Sexuality -- posted at: 5:00am EST

Love the show? Support it on Patreon.

Did you hear? Dylan and I are planning an episode in the next few weeks. We'll have a short episode for everyone, and a longer bonus episode for Patreon supporters. YAY!

Also, don't forget to send in your sex confessions! May's theme is FOOD. I created a guidelines page for you

NW Mom wrote in with her confession about the mess she's in with a married man. Can she find her way out? She's lonely, she just discovered her sexual pleasure after a 20-year marriage, and yet, this amazing man can't be there for her. He knows it's not easy on her, so ending things shouldn't be a shock for him.

Jess wrote in about her improved sex life and the new body safe Fun Factory vibrator she just got. Listening to the show has helped her sex life in fantastic ways and I am tickled.

Jenister has a problem. She is bisexual, has anxiety, and wants to explore group sex with her partner. The only problem is she and her boyfriend have had threesomes before to great success. But, she is finding herself feeling super jealous and insecure when they look for potential play partners and she feels terrible. How can she overcome her jealousy and make the group sex fun again?

Also, let's just honor Jenister's frustration about telling straight guys that she's bi - it's like they assume it means threesomes are automatically in the cards. UGH. NO.

How do we care for ourselves when we feel jealous? How do you make space for meltdowns and insecurity without judging yourself?

If you're interested in one-on-one coaching, check out my options here.

What do you do if your friend is obsessed with having a boyfriend and totally defines their worth based on whether they're dating someone or not? I have thoughts. We live in a world that tells us we should all be on a quest for relationship, and that our worth is defined by the romantic partners we have. It's a big box to unpack.

Bree Speed has way too much cum in her life. Her boyfriend shoots everywhere and she is cleaning cum off of everything. Is she the only one in this position? I have big thoughts like why isn't HE cleaning up his own mess? Why isn't he doing his laundry and taking care of this? 

Follow Sex Gets Real on Twitter and Facebook. It's true. Oh! And Dawn is on Instagram.

About Dawn Serra

Sex is a social skill. I speak it. I write it. I teach it. I help you learn how to develop it.

I am the creator and host of the laughter-filled, no-holds-barred weekly podcast, Sex Gets Real. I lecture at colleges and universities on sex and relationships, too.

When I'm not speaking and teaching, I also work one-on-one with clients who need to get unstuck around their pleasure and desire.

But it's not all work! In my downtime, I can often be found watching an episode of Masterchef Australia, cooking up something delicious, or adventuring with my sexy AF husband.

Listen and subscribe to Sex Gets Real

  1. Listen and subscribe on iTunes
  2. Check us out on Stitcher
  3. Don't forget about I Heart Radio's Spreaker
  4. Pop over to Google Play
  5. Use the player at the top of this page.
  6. Now available on Spotify. Search for "sex gets real".
  7. Find the Sex Gets Real channel on IHeartRadio.

Hearing from you is the best

Call or text: 747-444-1840 (standard messaging rates apply)

Contact form: Click here (and it's anonymous)

Direct download: Episode_158.mp3
Category:Health, Sexuality -- posted at: 6:00am EST

Love the show? Support it on Patreon.

Patreon supporters! The supporter-only PJ party is April 17th, so check it out at patreon.com/sexgetsreal and support at any level to get access.

I am reading a devastating, lyrical book called "Abandon Me" by Melissa Febos. I'm desperately working to get her on the show soon to talk about her memoir (and her former work as a dominatrix).

In the meantime, this week's show is a fun, informative interview with Siouxsie Q.

We dive into her work with the Free Speech Coalition combatting harmful anti-porn, anti-sex work laws, including talking about what we can do, as consumers of porn, to help protect workers in the industry. You'll be especially horrified at the new set of laws sweeping the U.S. in the wake of the "porn health crisis" that everyone is freaking out about - with zero evidence, I might add.

Then we talk about why porn is her favorite, what her parents think of her adult industry career, and we wrap up our chat fielding some listener questions about polyamory and non-monogamy.

Oh! And we dive into why sex is magic and why sex workers are some of the most powerful beings on earth. LOVE IT.

It's a blast, Siouxsie is so sweet and smart, and I know you're going to love it.

Don't forget to send in your sex confessions! I created a guidelines page for you. March & April's theme will be messes!

Follow Sex Gets Real on Twitter and Facebook. It's true. Oh! And Dawn is on Instagram.

About Siouxsie Q

Siouxsie got her start in the business dancing at the unionized Lusty Lady Theater in San Francisco, and has worked as a performer in adult films since 2012, garnering two AVN Award Nominations and a Feminist Porn Award. During that time, she has been an unrelenting advocate for the rights of all sex workers.

Siouxsie Q is an author, weekly columnist for SF Weekly, and the creator of The Whorecast, a podcast network showcasing the diverse voices of the adult industry. She has lectured extensively on sex and sex work, and is regularly quoted and featured in the mainstream media, including CNN, USA Today, Cosmopolitan, Wired, Buzzfeed and America with Jorge Ramos. Her first book, Truth, Justice, and the American Whore, was published this year through 3L Media to rave reviews.

She joined The Free Speech Coalition, the trade association of the adult industry, in May of 2016, to help them soundly defeat both Cal/Osha Regulation 5193.1, and Proposition 60, both of which would have put adult film performers at immense risk.

She recently has returned to performing in adult films, and is excited to continue campaigning for the rights of adult industry workers, specifically through combatting the harmful wave of legislation declaring pornography to be a "public health crisis."

You can stay in touch by following Siouxsie on Twitter @whorecast, @siouxsieqjames, @fscarmy, by reading her book "Truth, Justice, and the American Whore," by checking out Free Speech Coalition, and by popping over to Instagram as TheRealWhoreNextDoor.

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Direct download: Episode_157.mp3
Category:Health, Sexuality -- posted at: 6:00am EST