Sex Gets Real with Dawn Serra

Trigger warning: talk of suicide

From the early days of queer porn to managing sex positive feminist shops to getting internet famous for her epic orgasm quest, Crista Anne - the rainbowiest of rainbow people - joins the show this week.

One of the things I've admired about Crista Anne for so long is her fierce, unapologetic approach to sharing her own struggles. She doesn't hide behind the internet and try to craft a perfect image. Her vulnerability and courage when it comes to her struggles with orgasm and depression caught my attention a while back, and I'm excited she's bringing that spirit to the show this week.

Plus, some of THE funniest quotes we've had on the show in a while.

Psst...did you know you can follow Sex Gets Real on Twitter and Facebook? It's true. Oh! And Dawn is on Instagram.

In this episode, Crista Anne and Dawn:

  • Have to make a little mansplaining joke after reflecting on a time when the internet was actually a nice place rather than a place full of harassment and cruelty.
  • Talk about how masturbation saved Crista Anne's life many times.
  • Roll around in Crista Anne's orgasmquest - her quest to experience orgasm after some anti-depressants made her orgasms go away. The daily regimen she put herself on to reawaken her vulva and clit is amazing.
  • Dig into how the medical community in the U.S. is not sex positive and most people don't know that so many medications (including over the counter stuff like Sudafed) can have sexual side effects. If you're already feeling broken and then your libido drops or you lose your orgasm, it just compounds the bad.
  • Answer a listener question about living with anxiety and trying to find sex partners. On top of that, this listener thinks she might be bisexual, but hasn't been able to work through the anxiety to actually have sex with a woman to find out.
  • Share how they navigate online dating and what they put in their profiles in order to weed out the folks who aren't a good fit, so they can get to people who are interested in what they bring to the table.
  • Field a question from Ily about short girl problems. Her new potential sex partner is very tall with a huge cock, and she doesn't know how to prepare herself for accommodating a big penis. Bottom line - you have have have to get as fully aroused as possible, and then lube and patience.
  • Why the "tight pussy" thing isn't actually a good thing.
  • Explore a listener question about threesomes. He has been asking his wife almost weekly for 20 years and now it's finally going to happen. We talk about how abusive it is to ask anyone to do something every week for many years, but if the wife truly is choosing this for herself, we have thoughts on navigating the minefield.

Resources discussed in this episode


Tantus toys

About Crista Anne

Crista Anne is a rainbow colored pleasure revolutionary whose work focuses on starting conversations and busting stigmas surrounding the intersections of sexuality, mental illness and sex-positive parenting with her Partner XVO. With 15 years of working in different spheres of sexuality, Crista has been sharing her empowered sexuality online since before the term blog existed. You can find her work at and on Twitter @pinkness.

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Direct download: Episode_116.mp3
Category:Health, Sexuality -- posted at: 10:53am EST